The Churning

Since the first post in January I’ve not shared anything and like I know and was reminded again on Sunday…consistency is important and fresh stories better than old. The only explanation I can offer is that so much has happened since the first day of the year and I’m still amazed it’s only February and not September. With everything that has gone down, it feels like 2016 is ebbing and not in its nascent stages.

Unexpected personal developments upended my set plans for January. The usual twenty-days of reflection followed by a mega fest of instruction for the New Year had to be modified. Emotional and physical strain became the order of the day, the first being more trying than the latter. Anyone that saw me then would not have a clue to the squall of emotions seething beneath. Some may have wondered why I seemed more tired than ‘normal’, then again don’t I always have that look.

I practically overdosed on Yoruba movies and spent more hours upright in a waiting room than I thought possible. When I reflect on how mine was considerably scaled back compared to my siblings, I only know that it’s only Grace that brought us through. I discovered reserves of physical stamina I didn’t know I possessed and was moved to my core to discover that Asakun was the very definition of strength.

During this episode the sun rose and set, ocean tides ebbed and life as we know it continued. It brought to the fore how segmented and insular personal experiences are wont to be. As the popular saying goes…OYO (on your own) lo wa! Ultimately everything that happens is focused to the person or group to which it occurs. So when someone that hasn’t experienced what another has and says they know what you’re going through, they actually do not.

So when we’re going through the crucible (whatever form it turns out to be) the world probably will not notice and even if it does it cannot stop just because of you. You have to press on and continue, often with a semblance of outward normalcy to others. However, that’s life and what makes humanity resilient and adds colour to the lives concerned. In that regard, my life has become more colourful and made me more appreciative of family and loved ones.

Because of this 2016 has changed once again for me and I’m learning how to navigate and include the lessons I’ve learned into my daily life. There were times it was like an out of body occurrence and processing each additional piece of information took some doing. Life gives various tests and only in taking them do we learn more about ourselves and the world at large. In all a better understanding of self occurs and gives a clearer perspective on circumstances.

Deeper self discovery and knowledge stems out of personal encounters, however the bittersweet often seems to grant greater clarity. These incidents become mirrors through which we get to see parts of us which we may have guessed was present or previously did not realise existed. Profound life changing moments have forged personalities (for the good or other) out in the open with people being none the wiser.

As the rest of the year beckons it’s certain that moments of stress, tension, anxiety, joy, cheer and varied emotions await. Juggling these with the business of living and functioning the best way possible is the challenge we all face. Riding those waves and at the same time being compassionate enough to remember your humanity when relating with others will take you far. To be sure not everyone will appreciate it and some will try and take advantage when you do, but remembering the things that matter is crucial. So make sure you choose compassion and understanding each time not because of anyone else necessarily but as a deliberate act to become the person you would be proud to call friend. Easier said than done right?



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